Id like to say Im glad I found this forum. That image you have as your avatar the yellow rings and violet background is amazing to me. I can remember seeing that image as a child and thinking it looked like swirling flowers. I described it to a couple of people including my dad but I don't know if anyone really understood what it was. To see it drawn out like that is pretty cool. I tried Roy Masters meditation after suffering what was seemingly an emotional breakdown from being involved with the wrong people my last year of high school, starting to drink alcohol, using marijuana continually despite having bad experiences, depending on peers and peer pressure, not being who I ought to be, and just generally starting to do stupid stuff that I thought was cool at first but turned into a personal nightmare. I gradually developed a paranoia and strange fear of being around other people. When using the meditation I think just because of the confused fearful mental state I was in I dont think I was meditating properly I actually developed a strange feeling with the muscles of my forehead feeling not like a headache but I guess I was straining to try and meditate. But I have had a lot of positive things come from the meditation that I am starting to see more and more in recent days. That pattern of light which you described I saw as a child when my eyes were open then I kind of didn't see it anymore as I got older. Now with the meditation I see it again but I don't only see the rings I see the light radiating all around in the same manner as the rings but just not in one spot. It's hard to explain. But I'd like to say it's cool to have found this forum and I just wanted to share a little bit of my experience with you all.

Brandon,

Welcome to the Dionysus Forums! It was nice of you to share some of your experiences regarding personal struggles as well as describing how the meditation has effected your life. It sounds as though you're beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. You mentioned that you had a lot of positive things come from the meditation. The strange sensation in your forehead might have come from concentrating too hard but I don't really know. Roy said in his book, "How Your Mind Can Keep You Well", that you shouldn't concentrate too hard or look up and strain your eyes. But I don't know if this was the case. I have felt funny sensations around the area of my temples but it wasn't really pain, just kind of a twitching, crawling sensation. As you said, it's difficult to describe. I guess everyone's experiences with the meditation are different. I hope you enjoy the Forums and I look forward to hearing from you again. I should say "We" as I'm sure that everyone here extends a warm welcome.

Thanks for picking this up Pegasus, and thank you Brandon for your post. Welcome aboard!

Yes, basically when you strain too hard you become locked or fixated upon what you're thinking, which becomes more a matter of hypnosis, and is the opposite effect of what Roy would have you achieve. Basically what you're trying to do is learn how to relax, in the process of sorting out past traumas and fixations and whatnot, and channeling this new found energy throughout your body.

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So when the body dies, and consciousness departs, where do "we" go? ... Off to define another "reality" perhaps?

Iacchus,

I've been meditating almost a year and a half. I remember reading in Roy's book, "How Your Mind Can Keep You Well", that it could take three minutes or three days to notice any benefits from the meditation exercise. I've also heard people say that for some it takes much longer--even years. Would it be correct to say that it's a gradual unfolding? I've heard callers speak of "seeing things" that come up during the meditation. They talk about things that are revealed to them during the meditation. One woman called Roy's radio program the other day and she said that meditating brought out the memory of being raped when she was very young. She already had a vague memory of it before she began meditating. Roy says that you need to have the right attitude along with the meditation. I've heard him say that the meditation exercise by itself is nothing unless you have the sincere desire to make the changes necessary to become a better person along with the basic idea of using firmness, kindness and patience when dealing with other people. In the beginning, I thought I noticed a difference as far as being able to focus on one thing at a time and finishing it but lately I can't seem to concentrate very well at all. I think part of it is that people are walking in and out of the office all day because that's where most of the files are kept. I'm the only one in that particular office except for Dr. "P" (that's what they call him). He's only there until 10:30 so that doesn't bother me. He's a medical consultant and he comes in every morning to look over medical reports and initials them and I have to open up all the mail that comes in (medical reports and physician and hospital bills), date stamp it and then match them up to the case records after I've pulled them. This requires me to run all over the place because many of the cases aren't in the file room. The case workers are at various stages of working on them or the accountant might have them in her office when she's processing the invoices. As I said, Dr. "P" doesn't bother me but everyone is running in and out all the time. People come in to discuss all their medical problems with him. One of the women comes in and stands over my desk and looks through the newspaper. I guess the reason why she does it is because she's afraid her supervisor will say something to her if she sees her reading the paper at her own desk. I've asked her before, "You can take it and read it at your desk, if you like." I seem to get very irritated lately over things that probably shouldn't bother me. They moved everyone around a few months ago when they were working on the walls (installing new sheetrock) and new carpeting after a pipe burst last winter during excessively cold temperatures. This required everyone to pack up everything and find office space elsewhere until the refurbishing was finished. I didn't have so many distractions where I was sitting before. I try to block the noise out by appearing not to be paying any attention to them whatsoever but I think they get the idea I'm being snobby or snooty. I had been sitting in an office by myself while they were doing the repairs, and I seemed to be able to get twice as much accomplished. People tell me I do more running around than anyone in the building. They see me on the stairs, in the corridors and on the elevator all day long because I also distribute mail between floors as the mailroom often puts mail in the wrong mail bin and there is also a lot of interoffice mail that needs to be distributed between floors. In a way, I suppose this is good because I need the exercise anyway. It's really the morning that I have to do the most rushing around because I have to open up the mail and get the medical reports ready for Dr. "P"--I've been rambling and getting off topic. Anyway, I'm not absolutely sure if the meditation exercise is helping or not. Is there something I'm missing?

So, what are you looking to get out of the meditation? Enlightenment? I think it's a good technique for learning how to relax and recharge your energy, but as far as enlightenment is concerned? And, while I may have experienced a sense of detachment and, to some extent a heightened awareness, rarely was I able to communicate this to anyone else. And usually after five or ten minutes the sensation would go away. So what's the point in trying to walk around like Jesus Christ all the time?

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So when the body dies, and consciousness departs, where do "we" go? ... Off to define another "reality" perhaps?